Sober Chick

Here are the unleashed pages of a sober chick in recovery. My journey (date of sobriety) began on June 13th, 2005. For 29 years of my life I was spiritually sick. Emotinally defeated by drunken black-outs, bulimic binging and purging episodes and self-mutilation, I finally surrendered.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

The Blahs!

Do you ever get pissed off that you can't have a drink like a normal person?

I feel bitter right now that I can't toss back a mix drink. I was at Trader Joes during rush hour, everyone in line seemed to have bottles of wine or beer in their purchase. Blah!!! I don't want to drink. I do believe that I am a REAL alcoholic and that a person like me can NEVER put a drop of alcohol in this body. I am just a little pissed that I am an alcoholic today, but I know it will pass . . .

I am grateful that I am sober today.
I am grateful to have a God that loves me
I am grateful that One Day At A Time works
I am grateful to see others live life on lifes terms and remain sober
I am grateful that I know the truth of my Disease
I am grateful that I have your support and embrace that you are with me now.


At 9/05/2006 8:55 PM, Blogger Tab tells all . . .

I am always sure that there are plenty of people we see in bars drinking...that probably "shouldn't" be drinking at all !

At 9/05/2006 10:35 PM, Blogger lash505 tells all . . .

Thats nice of you.

At 9/06/2006 1:28 AM, Blogger Katy tells all . . .

Hi my friend! Thanks so much for your encouraging words... You always seem to understand and shed some much needed light on the darkness. Thank you for being such a kind & loving soul

Boy, you said it... Powerful & Cunning Beast! Isn't it amazing how grateful and truly amazing we can feel at times, and then all of a sudden we find ourselves back down in the basement of the disease. I in fact, have little pity parties for myself quite often… When I see skinny people who have never even muttered the word "diet" let alone been on one. Just like alcohol, they are E-V-E-R-Y-W-H-E-R-E... Grocery stores, malls, restaurants, parks, parties, holidays, vacations, oh and lets not forget movies & TV!!!

I just wanted to remind you that you’re not alone and that this too shall pass! A very wise woman once said, “Our weaknesses, when we frown at our progress, are our greatest strengths. I truly believe this.” She’s a pretty wise lady that Sober Chick!!! ;O) Hang in there and know that I am here, chuggin along with you, cheering you on, and riding the ups and downs right beside you.

Much love,

P.S. You asked about my baby boys… They are doing great!!! In fact as we speak, Hamilton is laying on his back spread-eagle, in their cat bed (which sits on my desk), and Maximus is laying right between my arms (half-way on the keyboard) and purring away. I love these little guys so incredibly much!

At 9/06/2006 6:17 AM, Blogger Gwen tells all . . .

Great list ~ also a normie isn't even thinking or noticing what booze others buy.

Glad you don't want to drink cause I love have you on our team! Go Sobriety ~ rah rah rah!!!

At 9/06/2006 3:46 PM, Blogger Designer Girl tells all . . .

Oh, man, do I know what you mean, girlfriend! It's not that I WANT a drink right now or even today, but just knowing I CAN'T have one just triggers that irrational longing...

You're right: This, too, shall pass...

At 9/06/2006 8:32 PM, Blogger butterflygirl tells all . . .

It too shall pass.

At 9/07/2006 3:23 AM, Blogger Greg tells all . . .

Good morning SC :):):) Hows the house comming along? How r the "kids?"
Merry CHRISTmas

At 9/07/2006 7:24 AM, Blogger Sober @ Sundown tells all . . .

Sometimes I get frustrated with never being able to drink again. Just last Tuesday I was at an orchid meeting and they were passing out samples of some Brazilian liqueur. Everyone was enjoying the sample. I was very disappointed that I had to pass.

The problem with me is that I don't have the shut off mechanism that normal people do. I can't stop at just one, and if I didn't consume everyone's sample that night, my mind would be searching for the next drink, or high until it achieved it. That vicious cycle would consume me again, and I would be living solely for my next high.

At 9/07/2006 1:05 PM, Blogger Shannon tells all . . .

OMG I was thinking about that this morning.. LOL I am laughing at me... because this morning I was listenning to my radio show and the dj had a junket in NY and when she got there she partied and was saying how much fun it was... and for a split second I was like... OH my life is so boring, and I want to have fun and blah... it happens... we think that way. Sometimes for me at least it feels like its sooo out of the blue
I just had to remember that my LIFE IS GOOD AND FUN... just not at the moment I was in the car driving to work LOL

my friend jack always says, your disease is waiting for you, its out in the parking lot doing pushups...
so to me I took it as a sign that my disease was saying to me... yea thats fun.. when I know for me, if I even take a drink all bets are off

but you are right, it will pass and staying in the gratitude... thats good... and if the thoughts persist, go to meetings, talk to your sponsor.. thanks for your honesty
so I went on a tegent there I love you SC hugs


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